“Have to run with the others. First rule of the caucus race”. ~ {Alice in Wonderland}

“I know what will be a great idea”! They said. “Performing outside on the Lido deck”! They said.

It’s December 1999…This Cruise Ship contract runs right through Christmas and New Year. We simply have to mark the occasion, it’s about to become the year 2000!

So, head office send us VHS tapes of our Christmas Show and new Year Show. It’s a grainy video, featuring all the characters that work at the top. They’ve choreographed a quick, fabulous, cheesy show to be performed in the afternoons over the Christmas Cruise. Plus a New Year ‘spectacular’ to be performed outside 10 mins before midnight running up to the big moment.

Have you ever been on a Cruise Ship at Christmas? Do you know who sails then? All the Ba humbugs, the family outcasts, or the people who are trying to ESCAPE Christmas.

So you can imagine. We are all donned in out little santa outfits, bopping around to ‘Jingle bell rock and ‘Rockin around the christmas tree’. To an audience that are miserable. They are not interested. Oh apart from when we throw free toys at the end of the show. The mobs were real. Christmas spirit? I don’t think so….”Mine, mine, mine” they yelled like a bunch of seagulls scavenging for the last crumb of a sandwich.”

We arrive at New Years Eve however, it’s about to turn to the year 2000.

New. Years. Eve.

So here we come, prepped and ready with a few bangers. “We will rock you” …and “1999” etc.

We have been rehearsing for about a month. We are all dressed in new costumes.The show begins…..

…and it’s chaos.

We are outside. Fireworks are prepped and the passengers are, how can I put it, ‘wasted’. Within 2 minutes of our first number, the makeshift stage is SWAMPED with people. Passengers swarm us….joining in, dancing, yelling, picking us up and swinging us round.

Help!

So what is one to do?

We abort.

We let the music play and. we. run.

Who can blame the passengers? Who wants to watch a bunch of dancers in tacky costumes, step clap to Queen?? Ha.

So. We became part of the crowd and watched the chaos ensue.

5,4,3,2,1….Happy New Year!

Remember….things do not always go as planned. Sometimes you just have to say fuck it and give in.

Were the rehearsals a waste of time? Maybe. Was it one of the most memorable nights of my life? Yes. It was magic.